Republican Overlord: Obama's Just Like That Cowardly Italian Cruise…

Republican National Committee chairman Reince Priebus said something that many would interpret as sort of insane on television yesterday, comparing President Obama to the Italian cruise ship captain Francesco Schettino, who ran away like a little pussy while all those people on his boat were dying. » 1/30/12 4:47pm 1/30/12 4:47pm

Who Will Stop These Muppets from Tarnishing Fox News' Good Name?

The Muppets are liberal. No, they are communists. This, according to the Fox Business Network's Eric Bolling, who went on a spiel last month decrying the latest Muppet film's choice of villain — a greedy Texas oilman, a common stock villain in Hollywood motion pictures. And now the Muppets have publicly acknowledged… » 1/30/12 3:05pm 1/30/12 3:05pm

Ron Paul Knew All About His Beloved Racist Newsletters

The Washington Post is out with an excellent update on the history of the racist, homophobic, survivalist, nutcase newspapers that were published under his name in the 80s and 90s, which comes awfully close to confirming the most likely version of the story: He may not have written every word of them, but he sure… » 1/27/12 3:20pm 1/27/12 3:20pm

Some Ideas for Saving Newt Gingrich's Collapsing Florida Campaign

God, Newt Gingrich blew it so badly in last night's debate. After lobbying for several days to allow debate audiences to cheer again, and landing Wolf Blitzer, the most destructible sally of a debate moderator in world history, he simply allowed Mitt Romney to take advantage of the crowd and win the debate and… » 1/27/12 1:39pm 1/27/12 1:39pm

Behold These Angry Floridians Shouting at Each Other During a Newt…

Except for that one clip of the two teenage girls fighting out back in the circle pit while the mother encourages them on, this one from a Newt Gingrich rally is about as good as videos of annoying Floridians being annoying (at length) come. This lady shows up and heckles Gingrich monotonously and without… » 1/26/12 2:15pm 1/26/12 2:15pm

Why Can't Barack Obama and Jan Brewer Just Get Along?

Perhaps you have heard the news about this, the most destabilizing political scandal to hit American politics since Teapot Dome: President Obama and Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer had a modest disagreement about her new book, Scorpions for Breakfast, on the tarmac yesterday. The photographers even captured her pointing at… » 1/26/12 1:35pm 1/26/12 1:35pm

Newt Gingrich Will Establish a Permanent Moon Base, But What About Mars?

Newt Gingrich was campaigning on Florida's Space Coast today when he decided, fuck it, I'm pandering: "By the end of my second term we will have the first permanent base on the moon and it will be American." Sure, why not. What about Mars? "Gingrich also said he would push to develop propulsion technology that would… » 1/25/12 6:03pm 1/25/12 6:03pm

Obama's State of the Union Hits the Eighth Grade Reading Level

Barack Obama's State of the Union speech scored at an eight-grade readability level, according to the University of Minnesota's Smart Politics blog. His three SOTUs all rank among the six lowest scoring ones ever, and are on average "more than two grades lower than the 10.7 grade average for the other 67 addresses… » 1/25/12 5:16pm 1/25/12 5:16pm

Nancy Pelosi Is Not Hiding any Hilarious Ancient Secret about Newt…

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi has now hinted twice that she has some super lethal dirt on Newt Gingrich that would prevent him from ever becoming President of the United States. "There's something I know," she told CNN yesterday, mysteriously, bringing up all sorts of questions: How did he kill that mailman,… » 1/25/12 3:55pm 1/25/12 3:55pm

Fidel Castro Can't Fathom the 'Ignorance and Idiocy' of These…

Our old pal to the South, retired Cuban dictator Fidel Castro, has been watching these Republican debates, including the most recent one in which the candidates talked about Fidel Castro going to Hell. He has not been impressed, writing in an editorial that "the selection of a Republican candidate for the presidency… » 1/25/12 2:20pm 1/25/12 2:20pm

What Everyone Is Saying About the State of the Union

Tonight we witnessed President Obama outline all the proposals that will be blocked by Congress in the election year 2012. Drill for everything. Create jobs for the humans who want jobs. End more wars, try not to have new ones... but maybe have some new ones? 2012 is shaping up to be a banner year for America's… » 1/24/12 11:18pm 1/24/12 11:18pm